The Measure of a Man

This post is about three days later than I wanted, but better late than never. This is a post of complete excitement and gratitude for unexpected blessings and unknown pathways. Since I have been home from the hospital, and trying to figure out life, some people have been placed in my path that I thought were there to simply help cover some financial burdens. They have put my kids on scholarship to cover their tuition so they could continue to train and compete. I believed it was for the kids these incredible people came into our lives and extended an arm of support. It turns out I am the one that has been blessed with an arm of friendship and support. A very unforeseen door was opened, and a very foreign world was introduced. Without thinking, and a bit of desperation to be active and involved in something I jumped. Now here I am six months later, having taken part in a first-time event that showed me there are avenues that are unseen but certainly life altering. Not only...

I have had many great responses, feedback even criticism over the last couple posts; for which I am very grateful and am having a lot of fun. I am grateful for the advice and I hope others are gaining as well. Keeping with the goals and dreams or expectations verses contentment. I was sitting in a sacrament meeting and I really enjoyed the talks. I have taken a lot of what was said and twisted it to serve my purposes. Since we have entered the year 2020, let's twist that to an eye exam, "2020 is a year of vision." We all know hind sight is 20/20, because its much clearer than what is ahead. It is also difficult to focus on so many things at one time. In the sacrament meeting they spoke about, "Adjust Your Focus." The example was given: When driving if you stare at the road directly in front of the car it is difficult to stay in the lane; but but adjusting your focus and raising your gaze and look down the road, it is much easier to better picture. Her...

There is much to be said about building hopes and dreams. It actually is a vital part to our existence. So I ask, when is it no longer hopes and dreams, and no longer a positive, motivating and uplifting driving force. I sit day by day building myself for an unknown future, with expectations of perfect health and an ability to again one day train, resulting from dedicated and relentless self abuse a.k.a. physical therapy and doctors appointments, repetition after repetition, battle after battle, fall after fall. I have always been a dreamer but to make up for many regrets and to overcome doubts, I create hopeless expectations, that may be realistic in some other realm or dimension, but only breed failure, frustration and disappointment. It makes it very difficult to identify the victories along the journey when a timeline or bench mark isn't achieved. The old saying, "It's better to shoot for the moon and miss, you will still be among the stars," drives apart o...

I looked up the word hero in the dictionary.  There are four definitions for the word, the first and the fourth are my favorites and where my current focus lies.  1-  a:  a mythological or legendary figure often of divine descent   endowed   with great strength or ability b:  an  illustrious  warrior c:  a person admired for achievements and  noble  qualities d:  one who shows great courage 4-   an object of extreme admiration and  devotion   :  IDOL Everyone has and needs a hero in their life.  At least one, and it doesn't matter if that changes or adds to daily.  I had in mind to recognize three of my heroes, but instead will focus on two unsung heroes that impact my life every single day.   Many have followed my updates about my hero that passed away from battling cancer, and about my friend the Cap'n.  They rightfully deserve every ounce of admiration and e...

We are taught to serve others and to "bear one another's burdens."  Who?  What?  Why?  Where?  How?  When?  Surprisingly this is not a new principal and is taught by nearly every religion; fraternity; sorority; sports teams and the US Military. I have shared the Soldier's Creed as well as the Army Values, a line within the Creed states: "I will never leave a fallen comrade." As fraternal brothers we have promised to help a brother in need. As teammates we recognized every single person's role was necessary. In athletics as well as in the military it was quickly identified who the "weak links" would be.  We also knew that we truly were only as strong as our weakest member.  So do we just leave this teammate? Many have covenanted, or taken oaths, or live by values that does not allow, us to simply walk away.  You can even say the better part of humanity can't ignore the fallen.  But how far must one fall before they deserve our...

Everyday we have an incredible blessing and opportunity to start over, to re-commit. I find myself getting stuck in quicksand and can waste an entire day.  I will battle every demon I can see, just to get tripped by reality.  Things can be moving along and seemingly progressing, when suddenly I am sinking.  It might be a simple step, or a crack in the cement, or my favorite a rug or floor mat.  "Seriously?  It is only one step."  or "It is just a box of macaroni and cheese, it should only take ten minutes."  Then there is my new favorite, "No problem, I can get there."  When reality says, who is going to get you there, and you are in way to much pain and still need a nap or you won't make it to two o'clock.  Every time reality rears its ugly face, it takes the breath right out of me.  Just seven or eight months ago, it wouldn't have been a seconds thought,  whereas now its full concentration and commitment, Go or No-Go.  The ...

The Army is one of the greatest blessings in my life.  I cherish and miss my time served every day of my life.  In many ways the Military was preparation for this new adventure.  We were trained to accomplish the mission at all cost, and to place the lives of our subordinates above our own.  The Army laid out it’s seven values, which coincide perfectly with the higher values I was raised with.  The Army Values are: These have easily adapted to mean different or rather more in my personal and professional life. Personal Courage for instance is a constant, relentless driving force to get up and face another day.  I have mentioned many times just how much I now love my morning routine.  What was my favorite time of the day, is now dreaded from the time I lay down at night, and gets worse as morning approaches.  A part of me wants nothing more than to lay there and avoid the inevitable at all costs, even questioning is it worth the fight, “I’m ...

This post comes from a little different approach. Ever since the seizure, I have spent everyday wondering, Where do I go from here? or What am I supposed to learn from this?  I have really tried to avoid the, Why me? Wormhole.  What I am learning is that each day is it's own adventure. With the new year, and everyone dead set on setting their new year's resolutions, I took a slightly sarcastic approach.  I just want to survive.  I figured that was enough for this year.  I have come to realize that often time the best thing to do, is the next thing.  I never thought I would ever admit to this, A Disney Princess has the best advice.  My kids were determined to take me to see Frozen 2, they had all watched it at least once.  But needed me to see it.  Actually I'm glad they did,  Princess Anna sings a song near the end of the movie that is perfect.  Take each day as a blessing.  Take each moment as a challenge.  "Do the n...

Another miracle/blessing realized after a lifetime of preparation. I don't remember much of the first few days after the brain surgery, other than the doctor and nurses asked an endless barrage of questions.  I don't know or remember anything I answered, but I do remember the responses.  I can't remember what exactly was said but the gist was; It's a miracle that he can communicate at all.  The location of the tumor should be impacting all of his basic communication function, on top of the general motor function.  Technically, he should be a drooling squash.  The fact that he is responding to all our questions and understanding the majority of what is said, this is a miracle.  I spent at least an hour every day for the next four weeks in speech therapy.  Taking cognitive function tests, and problem solving tests.  I was initially diagnosed with moderate short-term memory loss; as well as minor impairment of cognitive function.  Minor me...